Lucky You ( 5/8 Sat. )
Lucky You ( 5/8 Sat. )
Dear YOYO folks,
Usually, people like to be in good luck and hates to be in bad fortune. How often do you think you are a lucky person? And what situations will make you feel bad fortune? Do you think it is possible to create your good luck? How? Recent research has demonstrated that people can become luckier by engaging in techniques designed to help them think and behave like a lucky person. Most people may regard lucky to be spontaneous; however, it is traceable in fact. As long as you find the way to luck, you can keep it constantly. So I pick up this interesting and useful article to take everyone explore the world of "luck". (I will post it below)
Welcome everyone’s participation and feel free to bring with your lucky charms or lucky persons to share your fortunate experiences with us. We all deserve a good life. Let's put efforts to cultivate our lucky personality. Good luck to you!
Here come the questions:
1. Is there any connection between feeling happy and being lucky?
2. According to your experience, what things can bring you with luck most? And what kind of people or who can make you lucky most often?
3. Do you believe that lucky charms or change feng shui can bring you luck? Do you have any tips to be lucky?
4. If you open yourself to new experience, do you believe you can make your own luck? Can you give us some examples?
5. Are there any common features for those lucky persons?
6. Do you have any idea or other person's experience about how to be lucky in love?
7. Do you have any idea or other person’s experience about how to be lucky in job?
Usually, people like to be in good luck and hates to be in bad fortune. How often do you think you are a lucky person? And what situations will make you feel bad fortune? Do you think it is possible to create your good luck? How? Recent research has demonstrated that people can become luckier by engaging in techniques designed to help them think and behave like a lucky person. Most people may regard lucky to be spontaneous; however, it is traceable in fact. As long as you find the way to luck, you can keep it constantly. So I pick up this interesting and useful article to take everyone explore the world of "luck". (I will post it below)
Welcome everyone’s participation and feel free to bring with your lucky charms or lucky persons to share your fortunate experiences with us. We all deserve a good life. Let's put efforts to cultivate our lucky personality. Good luck to you!
Here come the questions:
1. Is there any connection between feeling happy and being lucky?
2. According to your experience, what things can bring you with luck most? And what kind of people or who can make you lucky most often?
3. Do you believe that lucky charms or change feng shui can bring you luck? Do you have any tips to be lucky?
4. If you open yourself to new experience, do you believe you can make your own luck? Can you give us some examples?
5. Are there any common features for those lucky persons?
6. Do you have any idea or other person's experience about how to be lucky in love?
7. Do you have any idea or other person’s experience about how to be lucky in job?
The article "Lucky You--The 7 Secrets of good fortune&q
Lucky You
The 7 Secrets of good fortune
By Marc Myers
Late on the night of June 16, 1997, Karen Minahan was loading a box of wires into the back of her son’s van. The 55-year-old event manager had been helping her son, an aspiring disc jockey, videotape a secondary school dance at the fairgrounds in the Puyallup, Washington. As Minahan shut the back door, a car swerved onto the road where the van was parked and hit the vehicle from behind, crushing Minahan. Incoherent, the driver backed up and hit Minahan two more times before the crowd forced the drunk driver to stop.
All of Minahan’s ribs were broken, her lungs were punctured, and her right leg had to be amputated on the spot by emergency workers. Air-lifted by helicopter to the Harbourview Medical Center’s trauma unit in Seattle, Minahan slipped into a coma that lasted almost four weeks.
The 26 operations that followed over the next four years were painful, and the loss of her leg and her job could have been devastating. But Minahan, a lifelong hard-charging optimist kept her spirits high, persuading doctors along the way to appoint her to six boards that raise money for people who need limbs. “I’ve always thought of myself as lucky and still do,” says Minahan. “Now I’ll be able to help people who are less well-off than I am.”
Like Minahan, many of us believe in luck. We carry lucky charms, wear lucky shirts and perform little rituals before important events. Fearful of jinxing their luck, Westerners won’t walk under ladders, while Chinese people avoid the number four, which they associate with death.
When life miraculously goes our ways, we assume it’s pure chance. But is it really? Winding up in the fastest –moving lane at a toll plaza may seem like serendipity, but more likely we saw the slow lanes in advance and avoided them.The same goes for finding a parking space. Didn’t you slow down a little after spotting someone taking his keys as he walked?
Experiences like these make us feel good, but only for a moment. We really want longer-lasting luck—having a fulfilling job, a mate you love, great friends, a comfortable life, peace of mind. To create such good fortune, you need to develop a “lucky personality,” a combination of attitude and behavior that attracts opportunity.
“People who seem lucky are appealing because they are effective and happy,” says Ellen Langer, a professor of psychology at Harvard. “We are drawn to them because we feel safe around them, we hope they’ll help us succeed, and maybe their luck will rub off on us.”
Think lucky and you’re more likely to be lucky. But a lot depends on how well you develop a lucky personality.
7 Secrets of Lucky People
1. Assume fate is on your side. To cultivate the right attitude, you must believe good things happen to you all the time, on just rarely, says Martin Seligman, professor of psychology at the University of Pennsylvania and the author of Authentic Happiness. If you perceive life’s setbacks as business as usual, you won’t bother behaving in positive ways that can change your situation. On the other hand, “if you believe you are fortunate much of the time, you are likely to exhibit behavior that makes people more responsive to you,” explains Seligman.
2. Get an emotional grip. Lucky thinking also arrests what David Lykken, professor emeritus of psychology at the University of Minnesota, calls your “happiness thieves.” These luck limiting emotions include shyness, anger, and resentment, which, he says, turn off people who otherwise would be willing to help you.
Getting these negative emotions under control will likely help you have a higher level of self-esteem, be more optimistic, and be slightly more extroverted. “It’s one thing to feel these negative emotions but another to show them,” says Raymond DePaulo, chair of psychiatry at Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine and author of Understanding Depression. “If you recognize what triggers these emotions – recognize that you can take steps to defuse or overcome them before they are expressed.”
Eric Rofes, 48, used to feel he was powerless to change his negative emotions. An education professor, Rofes says he’d automatically view the bad side of every situation. Such negative behaviour, he says, attracted others who viewed everything as “awful and hopeless,” and who had a hard time completing the academic projects they had worked on.
“I finally decided I wanted to limit the amount of negative drama going on in my life,” he says. By putting setbacks in an imaginary envelope labelled “waste of time” and brushing off negative people he came to view as “toxic,” Rofes says his attitude changed. Now he attracts positive people who have asked him to join projects that actually get finished.
3. Open your mind to opportunity. You can’t predict what fate has in store for you. But you can improve your luck by training yourself to be more trusting of people and confident that positive outcomes will result from these encounters, says John Krumboltz, professor of education and psychology at Stanford University.
For example, we often resist sharing ideas at work with colleagues for fear they’ll steal them and we won’t receive proper credit. But in truth, people who routinely share ideas are invited to participate in the critical meetings where opportunity abounds, because they are valued for their great ideas locked up, that’s exactly where they’ll stay.
“I used to believe I was hard-wired to look on the bad side of everything and distrust everyone,” says Rofes. “Now I’m more likely to be open and to hear what people have to say, which has made me more approachable and an easier target for opportunity.”
4. Think of the world as yours. You won’t improve your luck sitting at home. Embrace random events that happen to you and see their potential for improving your luck, says Krumboltz. He calls this technique “planned happenstance.” “Always keep your options open and be prepared to make mistakes,” he says. “You get more in life when you are willing to learn than by closing everything out.”
Stephanie Rice didn’t plan to meet her future husband on a New York-to –London flight in 1997. In fact, the Houston sales and marketing executive had hoped to sleep through the trip. But shortly after take-off, a man she exchanged glances with earlier came by and asked if he could sit in the empty seat next to her.
They spent the rest of the flight talking. Three years later, they were married. “Meeting Tim was lucky,” she says. But Stephanie also pushed forced myself to chat because I hoped it would lead somewhere. I believe in fate, but I also believe you make your luck if you’re open to new experience.”
5. Keep envy in check. People who obsessively compare their lives with the lives of others often wind up feeling unlucky. For example, obsessing over the good fortune of a lottery winner, someone at work who got a big promotion or a friend who’s dating a highly attractive mate can make you feel like a failure, warns Ellen Langer.
In reality, says Langer, none of these so-called strokes of good fortune guarantees happiness. Many lottery winners wind up with larger problems; promotions often lead to bigger headaches; and mismatched mates can lead to jealousy and other anxieties. What looks ideal from the outside in reality may not be ideal for you. Stay focused on your own goals and dreams.
6. Think like a “connector.” The more people you know and the more likable you are, the better your odds of becoming lucky. Malcolm Gladwell, author of The Tipping Point: How Little Things Can Make a Big Difference, calls these types of people “connectors.” Most connectors are lucky, he says, because they interact with large groups of powerful people who, in turn, share information and contacts just to stay in the loop.
Most of us find it hard to create casual bonds with acquaintances. Instead, we prefer to spend our spare time with close friends. But establishing and nurturing connector relationships need not be too demanding. For example, just jotting off a birthday card or sending an e-mail with useful information can keep you connected. “If you know many different types of people, you will hear about many more opportunities,” says Gladwell. “Sociability, energy and openness breed luck.”
7. Find an upside to everything. To feel lucky, you need a positive view of the past, as well as an optimistic view of the present, says Matthew Smith, professor of psychology at Liverpool Hope University in England and co-author of a 1998 study on luck. In the study, people who claimed to be lucky tended to remember more of the good things that happened to them in life and blocked out the bad. When something bad happens to them now, Smith says they compare the event with the worst that could have happened and realise they came out ahead.
That’s certainly true for Minahan. During the darkest days following her accident, Minahan kept a special diary. At the end of each day, Minahan wrote about five positive events that occurred and left out all of the pains, physical setbacks and other negative experiences. This exercise, she says, reminded her how fortunate she was at a time when it was easy to view her situation as miserable and hopeless. “I also decided to meet the woman who hit me that night and to forgive her,” Minahan says. “To heal and move on, you have to let go.”
The 7 Secrets of good fortune
By Marc Myers
Late on the night of June 16, 1997, Karen Minahan was loading a box of wires into the back of her son’s van. The 55-year-old event manager had been helping her son, an aspiring disc jockey, videotape a secondary school dance at the fairgrounds in the Puyallup, Washington. As Minahan shut the back door, a car swerved onto the road where the van was parked and hit the vehicle from behind, crushing Minahan. Incoherent, the driver backed up and hit Minahan two more times before the crowd forced the drunk driver to stop.
All of Minahan’s ribs were broken, her lungs were punctured, and her right leg had to be amputated on the spot by emergency workers. Air-lifted by helicopter to the Harbourview Medical Center’s trauma unit in Seattle, Minahan slipped into a coma that lasted almost four weeks.
The 26 operations that followed over the next four years were painful, and the loss of her leg and her job could have been devastating. But Minahan, a lifelong hard-charging optimist kept her spirits high, persuading doctors along the way to appoint her to six boards that raise money for people who need limbs. “I’ve always thought of myself as lucky and still do,” says Minahan. “Now I’ll be able to help people who are less well-off than I am.”
Like Minahan, many of us believe in luck. We carry lucky charms, wear lucky shirts and perform little rituals before important events. Fearful of jinxing their luck, Westerners won’t walk under ladders, while Chinese people avoid the number four, which they associate with death.
When life miraculously goes our ways, we assume it’s pure chance. But is it really? Winding up in the fastest –moving lane at a toll plaza may seem like serendipity, but more likely we saw the slow lanes in advance and avoided them.The same goes for finding a parking space. Didn’t you slow down a little after spotting someone taking his keys as he walked?
Experiences like these make us feel good, but only for a moment. We really want longer-lasting luck—having a fulfilling job, a mate you love, great friends, a comfortable life, peace of mind. To create such good fortune, you need to develop a “lucky personality,” a combination of attitude and behavior that attracts opportunity.
“People who seem lucky are appealing because they are effective and happy,” says Ellen Langer, a professor of psychology at Harvard. “We are drawn to them because we feel safe around them, we hope they’ll help us succeed, and maybe their luck will rub off on us.”
Think lucky and you’re more likely to be lucky. But a lot depends on how well you develop a lucky personality.
7 Secrets of Lucky People
1. Assume fate is on your side. To cultivate the right attitude, you must believe good things happen to you all the time, on just rarely, says Martin Seligman, professor of psychology at the University of Pennsylvania and the author of Authentic Happiness. If you perceive life’s setbacks as business as usual, you won’t bother behaving in positive ways that can change your situation. On the other hand, “if you believe you are fortunate much of the time, you are likely to exhibit behavior that makes people more responsive to you,” explains Seligman.
2. Get an emotional grip. Lucky thinking also arrests what David Lykken, professor emeritus of psychology at the University of Minnesota, calls your “happiness thieves.” These luck limiting emotions include shyness, anger, and resentment, which, he says, turn off people who otherwise would be willing to help you.
Getting these negative emotions under control will likely help you have a higher level of self-esteem, be more optimistic, and be slightly more extroverted. “It’s one thing to feel these negative emotions but another to show them,” says Raymond DePaulo, chair of psychiatry at Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine and author of Understanding Depression. “If you recognize what triggers these emotions – recognize that you can take steps to defuse or overcome them before they are expressed.”
Eric Rofes, 48, used to feel he was powerless to change his negative emotions. An education professor, Rofes says he’d automatically view the bad side of every situation. Such negative behaviour, he says, attracted others who viewed everything as “awful and hopeless,” and who had a hard time completing the academic projects they had worked on.
“I finally decided I wanted to limit the amount of negative drama going on in my life,” he says. By putting setbacks in an imaginary envelope labelled “waste of time” and brushing off negative people he came to view as “toxic,” Rofes says his attitude changed. Now he attracts positive people who have asked him to join projects that actually get finished.
3. Open your mind to opportunity. You can’t predict what fate has in store for you. But you can improve your luck by training yourself to be more trusting of people and confident that positive outcomes will result from these encounters, says John Krumboltz, professor of education and psychology at Stanford University.
For example, we often resist sharing ideas at work with colleagues for fear they’ll steal them and we won’t receive proper credit. But in truth, people who routinely share ideas are invited to participate in the critical meetings where opportunity abounds, because they are valued for their great ideas locked up, that’s exactly where they’ll stay.
“I used to believe I was hard-wired to look on the bad side of everything and distrust everyone,” says Rofes. “Now I’m more likely to be open and to hear what people have to say, which has made me more approachable and an easier target for opportunity.”
4. Think of the world as yours. You won’t improve your luck sitting at home. Embrace random events that happen to you and see their potential for improving your luck, says Krumboltz. He calls this technique “planned happenstance.” “Always keep your options open and be prepared to make mistakes,” he says. “You get more in life when you are willing to learn than by closing everything out.”
Stephanie Rice didn’t plan to meet her future husband on a New York-to –London flight in 1997. In fact, the Houston sales and marketing executive had hoped to sleep through the trip. But shortly after take-off, a man she exchanged glances with earlier came by and asked if he could sit in the empty seat next to her.
They spent the rest of the flight talking. Three years later, they were married. “Meeting Tim was lucky,” she says. But Stephanie also pushed forced myself to chat because I hoped it would lead somewhere. I believe in fate, but I also believe you make your luck if you’re open to new experience.”
5. Keep envy in check. People who obsessively compare their lives with the lives of others often wind up feeling unlucky. For example, obsessing over the good fortune of a lottery winner, someone at work who got a big promotion or a friend who’s dating a highly attractive mate can make you feel like a failure, warns Ellen Langer.
In reality, says Langer, none of these so-called strokes of good fortune guarantees happiness. Many lottery winners wind up with larger problems; promotions often lead to bigger headaches; and mismatched mates can lead to jealousy and other anxieties. What looks ideal from the outside in reality may not be ideal for you. Stay focused on your own goals and dreams.
6. Think like a “connector.” The more people you know and the more likable you are, the better your odds of becoming lucky. Malcolm Gladwell, author of The Tipping Point: How Little Things Can Make a Big Difference, calls these types of people “connectors.” Most connectors are lucky, he says, because they interact with large groups of powerful people who, in turn, share information and contacts just to stay in the loop.
Most of us find it hard to create casual bonds with acquaintances. Instead, we prefer to spend our spare time with close friends. But establishing and nurturing connector relationships need not be too demanding. For example, just jotting off a birthday card or sending an e-mail with useful information can keep you connected. “If you know many different types of people, you will hear about many more opportunities,” says Gladwell. “Sociability, energy and openness breed luck.”
7. Find an upside to everything. To feel lucky, you need a positive view of the past, as well as an optimistic view of the present, says Matthew Smith, professor of psychology at Liverpool Hope University in England and co-author of a 1998 study on luck. In the study, people who claimed to be lucky tended to remember more of the good things that happened to them in life and blocked out the bad. When something bad happens to them now, Smith says they compare the event with the worst that could have happened and realise they came out ahead.
That’s certainly true for Minahan. During the darkest days following her accident, Minahan kept a special diary. At the end of each day, Minahan wrote about five positive events that occurred and left out all of the pains, physical setbacks and other negative experiences. This exercise, she says, reminded her how fortunate she was at a time when it was easy to view her situation as miserable and hopeless. “I also decided to meet the woman who hit me that night and to forgive her,” Minahan says. “To heal and move on, you have to let go.”
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- YOYO member
- 文章: 149
- 註冊時間: 週五 1月 23, 2004 2:59 am
Kate: 我想...你只要想說.
現在很多人失業. 找都找不到工作.
一個 什麼 工作應徵機會 錄取率都在個位數上下...
新聞上都常在報阿...
所以有工作做.是不是也代表一種幸運呢?
每當我覺得心情不好.
就會看一部片子叫做 Cast away 中文 好像叫 劫後餘生.
是 湯姆漢克 演的. 現代 魯賓遜.
就會覺得 很多想當然耳 習慣於週遭的幸福.
其實何等珍貴...
又或者我會看看貼在牆上的 "拯救非洲兒童" 的海報.
看著 在盤旋禿鷹前的 骨瘦如材的兒童.
就會覺得自己好幸運 !!! I am Albert
現在很多人失業. 找都找不到工作.
一個 什麼 工作應徵機會 錄取率都在個位數上下...
新聞上都常在報阿...
所以有工作做.是不是也代表一種幸運呢?
每當我覺得心情不好.
就會看一部片子叫做 Cast away 中文 好像叫 劫後餘生.
是 湯姆漢克 演的. 現代 魯賓遜.
就會覺得 很多想當然耳 習慣於週遭的幸福.
其實何等珍貴...
又或者我會看看貼在牆上的 "拯救非洲兒童" 的海報.
看著 在盤旋禿鷹前的 骨瘦如材的兒童.
就會覺得自己好幸運 !!! I am Albert
In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.---Albert Schweitzer 史懷哲
- patty.liao
- YOYO member
- 文章: 108
- 註冊時間: 週二 12月 16, 2003 6:25 pm
- 來自: keelung