6/26(Tue.)The Best Years of Your Life (Host: David Jr.)

6/26(Tue.)The Best Years of Your Life (Host: David Jr.)

文章David Jr. » 週日 6月 24, 2018 10:58 pm

Hello everyone,
Sorry for posting the topic late.
We are going to discuss about the topic of "Getting old" on this Tuesday.
See you soon.

Source: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog ... -your-life

The Best Years of Your Life
Enjoy this time. But is it the best years of your life?

When I was young, there was no respect for youth.
Now there's no respect for the old.
I missed it both times!
Milton Berle (or so he claims)

When you were a teenager, were you ever told, "Enjoy this time, it's the best years of your life?" What a stupid thing to say. Youth is wasted on the young, and for most people, youth is hardly the best years of life.

Ours is a youth-obsessed culture, demanding living in the now with youthful gusto. Who has time for lessons learned and the wisdom that comes with age? Here's one example that only older people know: All this excitement about legalizing marijuana is being fomented by people who know nothing of the exhaustive social and scientific marijuana research conducted in the 1930s and the harmful biological effects in the 1970s. Older scholars know about this, but younger ones seem woefully uninformed and uninterested in "old" research. Actually, that often applies to old research in all fields.

We are all going to get old, assuming we don't die first. Our friends, relatives, and loved ones are or will get old. As baby boomers retire, older people are coming to dominate the population. Modern medicine and the wide pursuit of healthier living styles have enabled many older people to live longer and remain vigorous and productive in their old age. Yet, in this country and many other Western countries, we shun, neglect, and sometimes abuse the old. This is the theme of a recent blog by the CEO of a medical products company, Sue Chen.

Chen contends that as people age, others lose interest in engaging with them. A recent National Research Council study indicated that older adults are stigmatized as a group. Older people are treated like old people in social groups and in the workplace. Less is expected of seniors. Seniors in turn expect less of themselves. Chen asserts that younger people shun the elderly and don't want to think about aging because they are afraid of their own impending aging. They know that older people become more socially isolated and that the loneliness is magnified when divorce or death causes the loss of a spouse. Children are unintentionally conditioned to have negative bias about older people. Young families often shut out older parents, aunts, and uncles. We seem to have abandoned the "extended family" concept that was so wholesomely dominant only a few decades ago.

Fear of further aging and being sick and lonely grows with each passing year. Fear of aging is unwarranted, at least for healthy seniors with sufficient retirement income. Actually, one's later years can be the best years of life. Helen Hayes, at age 73, said "The hardest years are between 10 and 70." Paul Meyer, upon reaching 70, claimed that "Life begins at 70." By that time we all have accumulated a "rich reserve" of life experiences and lessons learned. He tries to do all the things he has always done. He points out some of the many advantages of old age, such as people expecting less of you. What you do accomplish makes a bigger impression because it isn't expected. At 70 you have more choices. You can act your age or act young. You can do things you didn't have time for in the past, particularly "smelling the roses." You can take naps without feeling guilty. You feel less guilty about the way you raised your kids, because now they know just how hard raising kids is and are having many of the same difficulties and angst as you did. Time becomes precious, because it is running out. You therefore spend it more wisely. You don't waste time on harmful emotions or personal animosities.

Now at 81, my experience is consistent with what Hayes and Meyer concluded. I am, even though semi-retired, more efficient and almost as productive in my profession as when I "retired." Amazingly, I have discovered more free time to work. And now, I get to do what I want to do, not what others want me to do. But the biggest advantage of aging, as I see it, is that older people have typically learned more about how to cope with disappointment and adversity and how to squeeze the sweet and good juice out of life.

In the absence of debilitating sickness, aging can be a great blessing. There are many things people can and should be doing to make the senior years the best years of their lives. These include eating well, exercising frequently and vigorously, constructing a positive emotional attitude, becoming more active in mental and social life, getting frequent medical checkups, and most of all I think, living with an honorable purpose.

Session 1 Discussion Questions:
1. Do you believe the youth is the best years of your life?
Or do you believe the cliche of "Life begins at 70"?

2. How old is "Old"?
How do we define "being young" or "being old"?

3. What's the meaning of "Being Old" or "Getting Old" to you?
Is "Death" or "Being Old" or "Getting Old" more horrible to you? Why?

Session 2 Discussion Questions:
4. What do older people's lives look like? What are the advantages and the biggest challenges of older people?
Have you ever imagined about your life when you are getting old?

5. What do older people desire the most? What do older people actually need?
How do we help older people fulfill their desire effectively and efficiently without taking too much resources?

6. What can we do to enhance the communication or fill the gap between young people and older people?

6:45 ~ 7:00pm Greetings & Free Talk / Ordering Beverage or Meal / Getting Newcomer’s Information
7:00 ~ 7:10pm Opening Remarks / Newcomer’s Self-introduction / Grouping
(Session I)
7:10 ~ 7:50pm Discussion Session (40 mins)
7:50 ~ 8:10pm Summarization (20 mins)
8:10 ~ 8:25pm Regrouping / Instruction Giving / Taking a 10 Minutes Break (Intermission)
(Session II)
8:25 ~ 9:05pm Discussion Session (40 mins)
9:05 ~ 9:25pm Summarization (20 mins)
9:25 ~ 9:30pm Concluding Remarks / Announcements ********************************************************************************************************************************************
聚會時間:當天請準時於 6:45 pm 到達 ~ 約 9:30 pm 左右結束
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最後由 David Jr. 於 週二 6月 26, 2018 3:21 pm 編輯,總共編輯了 1 次。
Remember all what your mom has told you, and do the opposite.
David Jr.
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來自: Lonely Planet

Re: 6/26(Tue.)The Best Years of Your Life (Host: David Jr.)

文章Rock » 週一 6月 25, 2018 5:50 pm

Hahaha, my topic. :lol:
In matters of style, swim with the current; in matters of principle, stand like a rock.
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Re: 6/26(Tue.)The Best Years of Your Life (Host: David Jr.)

文章Kooper » 週一 6月 25, 2018 11:47 pm

Thanks David for choosing a topic that is not difficult to discuss. I guess there will be no unanimous answer to this question. There are people who manage to age with grace while some others become more isolated with age or are suffering from chronic diseases or disabilities. Whether we will live the best years of our lives as the elder depends not only on our mindsets but the luck of the draw.
YOYO member
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註冊時間: 週三 4月 11, 2007 11:40 pm

Re: 6/26(Tue.)The Best Years of Your Life (Host: David Jr.)

文章Iris Wu » 週二 6月 26, 2018 8:50 am

Rock, you are not quite there yet, well, relatively! I know David Jr. well, he is very nice to host the topic and speak for me! :D
All are decent questions! They touch many aspects of our lives that we, the whole society, might have always deliberately put off or shunned away from.

“Getting older” is a process happening in every stage of our lives; “aging” or “being old” is an “inconvenient reality” that we all have to face sooner or later. We might as well learn to adapt to it with a more prepared, open-minded and healthy mindset.
Iris Wu
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註冊時間: 週二 5月 20, 2014 4:33 pm

Re: 6/26(Tue.)The Best Years of Your Life (Host: David Jr.)

文章Gloria Lo » 週二 6月 26, 2018 9:20 am

This is also my topic, I have a lot to talk about.
Wish me enough courage, or a glass of wine must help. :lol: :lol: :lol:
Gloria Lo
YOYO member
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Re: 6/26(Tue.)The Best Years of Your Life (Host: David Jr.)

文章Janice Wang » 週二 6月 26, 2018 9:50 am

In my opinion, age is just a number, nowadays, as appearances can be improved by plastic surgery and modern medicine, so, I think “getting old” isn’t as scary as the number appears to be; only if a person starts to repeat something again and again, that is my definition for ‘old’. However, “being old” or “ being young” which I think is highly considered to reflect a person’s mindset. In other words, an elder can have a young heart, vice versa, a young kid can have an old soul. I think “being young/old” is generally up to how a person takes on and reacts towards things.

When we are young, we see life’s value in terms of its length. But when we are older, we understand that it’s not about the length of one’s life, but rather about the quality of one’s life. For those who are living the last chapter of their life, “health” is the deciding factor on the quality of life. The healthier they are, the happier they will be.

Thankfully , medicine science has made people live a lot longer than before, but it hasn’t found a way to simultaneously improve the quality of life at an old age. I think physical deterioration is inevitable but manageable; however, mental isolation is something more serious and requires more urgent care.
Janice Wang
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註冊時間: 週六 3月 25, 2017 7:45 pm

Re: 6/26(Tue.)The Best Years of Your Life (Host: David Jr.)

文章toshi » 週二 6月 26, 2018 10:54 pm

Gloria Lo 寫:This is also my topic, I have a lot to talk about.
Wish me enough courage, or a glass of wine must help. :lol: :lol: :lol:

................................................^^^^^ keyword :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
YOYO member
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Re: 6/26(Tue.)The Best Years of Your Life (Host: David Jr.)

文章Kooper » 週一 7月 02, 2018 9:13 am

Attendees(28): Alicia, Andrew, Anne, Brian, Chris, Christine Hsiu, David Jr.(Host), Ellen, Felicia, Gloria, Iris, Janice, John, Kooper, Light, Luis, Maggie, Miller, Rock, Sherry, Shirley, Steve, Summer, Tashi, Tina, Way, Wenhan, Yvonne
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