12/12(Tue.) Should we make our life busier?(Host:Selina)

[Selina Lin]

Hi ladies & gentlemen,
Over this past year, I've been incredibly busy, and I know many of you have been too. So, let's take a moment to ponder: Is being busy good for us? And how can we manage it effectively?

Why busy life is actually a GOOD life, and five more myths about being busy
https://thebreverie.com/why-busy-life-is-good/

Session I: Let’s start with myths…
MYTH #1: BEING BUSY = BAD
(It means that you are passionate about something.
It means that you care about something.
It means that you are living a full, sophisticated, multifaceted life.
It means that your life is exciting and that it has a lot of flavors to it.)
Q1. Is being busy a positive or negative for you? Do you think being busy makes fulfilling and passionate life?

MYTH #2: BEING BUSY CAUSES STRESS AND OVERWHELM
Instead of trying to get EVERYTHING done, start getting the RIGHT things done.
(Things that matter.
Things that are important.
Things that are a true priority.
Things that are essential.)
Q2. How busy is your daily life, and how does it make you feel? How do you focus on important tasks in your life?

MYTH #3: IF YOU ARE BUSY YOU DON’T KNOW HOW TO RELAX
(here’s the paradox: “Once you normalize your relationship with your busyness, once you accept that side of yourself, then it actually becomes easier to relax.”
I know it sounds counterintuitive, but it all comes down to self-acceptance.
Once we learn how to accept one part of ourselves, it gets easier to accept other parts of ourselves too.
It is usually when you feel guilty for being busy, that you then feel guilty for not being busy.)
Q3. Do you agree that accepting your busyness makes it easier to relax?
 
MYTH #4: BUSY LIFE MEANS NO WORK-LIFE BALANCE
(When we fixate too much on one part of our life and when things go sideways in this area, we immediately feel like our whole life is falling apart apart.
What parts does your life consist of?
For example, there is work or business, but there is also family, there are friends, there are hobbies. And if work gets stressful, you have all these other areas to lean into to recharge, to regain energy. But in order to do that, you need to have a holistic picture of your whole life – you need your life map.)
Q4. What is your life made up of? How do you maintain balance between them (work, family, friends, and hobbies…)?

MYTH #5: BEING BUSY MEANS YOU DON’T KNOW HOW TO SAY “NO”
(But you can learn to say “yes” to the RIGHT things!
When you do that, you fill your life with things that bring you meaning, fulfillment, satisfaction –things that make your life much more exciting.
Notice, you are still staying busy. The busyness hasn’t gone away, but you filled it with things that are important, that matter most, that are the most essential.
And the beauty of that is once you start saying “no” to things that are nonessential, you free up the capacity to say “yes” to things that are.)
Q5. How do you persuade yourself to do things that are not attractive but beneficial to you?

MYTH #6: BUSY LIFE MEANS CHAOS
(Give yourself permission to be flexible. Give yourself permission to do today what you feel like doing today.
Yes, you should definitely have a vision. You should know what kind of life you want to build for yourself. But your vision should NOT dictate your day-to-day decisions. You should still have freedom to act today in accordance with today’s priorities, needs and circumstances.
As long as you have vision, as long as you check in with it regularly, you will still be moving in the right direction. And you don’t need a plan for that. You don’t need perfect structure. All you need is to allow yourself to be flexible and to embrace the change.
As well as embrace the strengths that you have that will allow you to continue living your sophisticated, multifaceted, exciting life.)
Q6. Do you believe being flexible makes a busy life manageable ?
 

Session II: After discussing the myths, let's think about…

1. if your busyness is caused by learning, what challenges may surface ? How do we conquer them?

2. When it's time to learn, do you prefer taking classes or self-learning? Why?

3. What methods make learning more effective and enjoyable for you?

4. Does learning give you a sense of accomplishment?

5. After our discussion, do you plan to stay busy or take it easy in the future?


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Agenda:
6:45 ~ 7:00pm Greetings & Free Talk / Ordering Beverage or Meal / Getting Newcomer’s Information
7:00 ~ 7:10pm Opening Remarks / Newcomer’s Self-introduction / Grouping
(Session I)
7:10 ~ 7:45pm Discussion Session (35 mins)
7:45 ~ 8:00pm Summarization (15 mins)
8:00 ~ 8:05pm Regrouping / Instruction Giving / Taking a 5 Minutes Break (Intermission)
(Session II)
8:05 ~ 8:40pm Discussion Session (35 mins)
8:40 ~ 8:55pm Summarization (15 mins)
8:55 ~ 9:00pm Concluding Remarks / Announcements

Meeting Date: As shown on the Subject Line
Meeting Time: 7:00pm – 9:00pm
Meeting Venue: 丹堤咖啡 Dante Coffee (Minimum Order $100)
Address: 台北市濟南路三段25號[MAP]-捷運忠孝新生站3號出口步行3分鐘

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Important Notes:
1. We advise participants to print out the discussion questions and bring them to the meeting for reference. As for the supporting articles, feel free to print them out, as well, according to your preference.
2. We suggest that participants read the articles and think about the questions in advance.
3. Newcomers should prepare a two-to-three minute self-introduction in English to deliver when called upon by the host before the start of the discussion. The host may also ask you to give brief feedback about the meeting at the conclusion of the meeting.
4. We conduct the entire meeting in English. All participants should have at least moderate English-conversation skills and be able to articulate your ideas for each discussion question.
5. We welcome newcomers and other guests to attend the meetings and join the discussion freely for two times. After that, we hope you will consider becoming a YoYo English Club member. We charge a NT$1500 lifetime membership fee, or NT$1000 for students.

[miller]

Move to the top.

[Kooper]

Well, I have a hard time following the author's reasoning as well as her wording...

The state of being busy itself should be neutral. There isn't necessarily a negative connotation to it, so are all of the myths that the author is trying to debunk. It's probably the case to most people that only being too busy, not simply being busy, is a problem. So my question is: are the myths really common?

[Sherry Liao]

I agree with Kooper that the state of being busy is neutral. I believe it’s what you’re busy with that makes your busy experience either positive or negative. For example, if you are doing something you love, on the right track to achieve your goals, or becoming the person you want to be, then being busy can be a pleasant experience. Conversely, if you lack motivation, passion or any goals for what you are doing, or if you feel like you are chasing your tail without making any real progress, then being busy could be negative.

[Rock]

Yes, it's suppose to be neutral. But look at my imaginary diary...

Dec. 01
Dear diary, I'm busy today....

Dec. 02
Dear diary, I'm also busy today.

Dec. 03
Dear diary, the business is good today, too. I'm super busy today. In fact, I've been busy for 186 days. Tomorrow is a holiday, but I'm suppose to visit so many friends and do so many things because it's my only free time so I want it to be fully packed. I also need to find a time to see the doctor, too.

[Iris Wu]

Firstly, I do appreciate the topic, but it doesn't necessarily mean I concur with the speaker's conclusion or the myths he/she presented.

Often, when hearing or saying, 'It has been so busy...', the underlying tone is a form of 'pride.' It is usually a 'happy complaint,' a 'bittersweet sentiment,' and in a way, an endorsement of self-value.

Instead, I frequently find ourselves involuntarily defending our “state of being not busy.” It seems that we will be judged if we confess that we are not busy. In my view, it presents a more profound myth entrenched in modern society.

[Rock]

Instead, I frequently find ourselves involuntarily defending our “state of being not busy.” It seems that we will be judged if we confess that we are not busy. In my view, it presents a more profound myth entrenched in modern society.

You just found another good topic out of this topic.

[Sherry Liao]

Instead, I frequently find ourselves involuntarily defending our “state of being not busy.” It seems that we will be judged if we confess that we are not busy. In my view, it presents a more profound myth entrenched in modern society.

Yes, that’s very interesting.

When my friends try to find a gathering time that works for everyone, and everyone starts throwing out “I’m available at XXX and YYY”, “I’m available at YYY and ZZZ”…. and then I say "I'm free at all the above time"... At that time I would think to myself, gee, I'm the only one who doesn't have a life