YOYO-ISG 110102 The Power of Vulnerability

YOYO-ISG 110102 The Power of Vulnerability

文章Kooper » 週六 12月 25, 2010 9:33 pm

Dear ISG members,

Please watch the TED speech and write an essay or summary on it. List one to three words that you think worth learning.

http://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_vulnerability.html
Kooper
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Re: YOYO-ISG 110102 The Power of Vulnerability

文章Kooper » 週二 12月 28, 2010 9:45 pm

I think I've picked an excruciatingly difficult topic to write about. :?
I'm still struggling to get myself off the hook...
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Re: YOYO-ISG 110102 The Power of Vulnerability

文章Kat C » 週五 12月 31, 2010 3:21 am

Hi Kooper,

I LOVE this talk! Maybe just write about YOUR take on vulnerability, wholeheartedness, and being "enough"? I think her approach is perfect for learning English too. :D
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Re: YOYO-ISG 110102 The Power of Vulnerability

文章Kooper » 週五 12月 31, 2010 9:49 pm

It's not complete but I'd like to post it as the ending of today's work. I'll finish the rest tomorrow.


Human beings are gregarious creatures; living in a society is all about building connections. Developing a relationship, however, is easier said than done. What makes it very challenging is the quality of vulnerability that has been deeply rooted in modern civilizations.

Vulnerability, typically appeared in the form of shame, is the fears or doubts a person has about themself – the worries that they’re not good enough in various ways (aspects) and thus don’t deserve to be loved or be accepted. Not surprisingly, theses negative feelings are prevalent but not very welcomed among mankind. The ways people deal with the dark thoughts fall into two distinct categories. Their different reactions lead to very opposite existences.

Some people choose to numb themselves, indulging themselves in drug, alcohol and the like and pretending that their susceptibilities don’t exist. The problem is not only do agonies and depressions are numbed, the abilities to feel joy and happiness are also taken away. Their second typical response is being stubborn and intolerant of different religious or political beliefs, in an attempt to make themselves feel more secure. In pursuit of perfection, they treat themselves harshly and try to perfect their offspring as well, which in turn makes the suffering being inherited (handed over) from generation to generation. Self-centered, they are blind to the adverse effects their deeds have on others. People in this category, in a nutshell, try to do away with vulnerability, but they turn out to be tightly trapped in it, ending up disconnected and isolated from others.

People in the second category embrace vulnerability. They’ve learned that insecurities are part and parcel of their lives and have managed to make peace with it. They live with imperfection and dare to show the world who they are rather than who they are expected or supposed to be. .....
Kooper
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Re: YOYO-ISG 110102 The Power of Vulnerability

文章Kooper » 週五 12月 31, 2010 9:52 pm

Kat C 寫:Hi Kooper,

I LOVE this talk! Maybe just write about YOUR take on vulnerability, wholeheartedness, and being "enough"? I think her approach is perfect for learning English too. :D

Hi Kat,

Thanks for your advice. I'd finished half of my summary when I saw your post so I decided to keep on current work. :ssmile:
BTW, will you join the coming meeting?
Kooper
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Re: YOYO-ISG 110102 The Power of Vulnerability

文章Sherry Liao » 週五 12月 31, 2010 11:30 pm

In the speech, Brene Brown views the word “vulnerability” in a positive perspective and gives it a brand-new meaning.

Brown majored in social work and spent years in social work research. She started her academic career with study of human connection, for she believed that connection provided meaning to our being in this world. In the research, she talked with a considerable number of cases and found that people were more focusing on disconnection when talking about connection. She dug into this issue and further found that this phenomenon came from the human nature of “shame”, that is, people were afraid of disconnection, and afraid that other people would find or know that they were not worthy of connection.

She examined cases and sorted out people who had a strong sense of love and belonging from those struggling for it, and then came at a critical conclusion: the former believed they were WORTHY of love and belonging. She further pointed out what those people had in common: they were wholehearted; they had a sense of courage to be imperfect; they had the compassion to be kind to themselves first, and most important of all, they were willing to let go of their awareness of themselves for connection.

The other common feature they shared was their embrace of vulnerability. They considered vulnerability necessary and fundamental to human connection. Brown emphasizes that we live in a world where vulnerability is inevitable. If we try to numb the bad feelings caused by vulnerable events, other good feelings such as happiness will be numbed, too. In addition, people tend to discharge pain and discomfort by asserting themselves and blaming others, and try to perfect and pretend to avoid the sense of vulnerability, which turns out to make their lives even worse and messier. The ways to enhance connection are to let ourselves to be fully seen by others, to love with whole heart even no guarantee of return, to practice gratitude lean to joy, and to believe we are enough.
Sherry Liao
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Re: YOYO-ISG 110102 The Power of Vulnerability

文章Kooper » 週六 1月 01, 2011 10:29 am

Here is the complete version.


Vulnerability: a Jekyll and Hyde

Human beings are gregarious creatures; living in a society is all about building connections. Developing a relationship, however, is easier said than done. What makes it very challenging is the quality of vulnerability that has been deeply rooted in modern civilizations.

Vulnerability, typically appeared in the form of shame, is the fears or doubts a person has about themself – the worries that they’re not good enough in various aspects and thus don’t deserve to be loved or accepted. Theses negative feelings are prevalent but not very welcomed among mankind. The ways people deal with the dark thoughts fall into two distinct categories. Their different reactions lead to very opposite existences.

Some people choose to numb themselves, indulging themselves in drug, alcohol and the like and pretending that their susceptibilities don’t exist. The problem is not only do agonies and depressions are numbed, the abilities to feel joy and happiness are also taken away. Their second typical response is becoming stubborn and intolerant of different religious or political beliefs, in an attempt to make themselves feel more secure. In pursuit of perfection, they treat themselves harshly and try to perfect their offspring as well, which in turn makes the suffering being inherited from generation to generation. Self-centered, they are blind to the adverse effects their deeds have on others. People in this category, in a nutshell, try to do away with vulnerability, but they turn out to be tightly trapped in it, ending up disconnected and isolated from others.

People in the second category embrace vulnerability. They’ve learned that insecurities are part and parcel of their lives and managed to make peace with it. Living with imperfection, the folks dare to show the world who they are rather than who they are expected or supposed to be. Truly believing that what makes them susceptible also makes them worthy of love and belonging, they are willing to express authentic feelings, to be the first one to get the ball rolling, to give even though there is no guarantee of return. They, as a result, build connections as a reward. Vulnerability is not a curse to them, but the breeding ground for pleasure, love and belonging.

Vulnerability is a blessing in disguise. Only those who have the courage to come toward it can see through the camouflage and reap the rewards.
Kooper
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Re: YOYO-ISG 110102 The Power of Vulnerability

文章Kat C » 週日 1月 02, 2011 2:12 am

Hi Kooper, another terrific piece! I'm glad you got it done. :D I've gone over it and you can tell me what you think of my suggested alternative wordings. I'll get on tonight if I make it home in time.

___________________________________________________________________________________________

Vulnerability: A Jekyll and Hyde Existence

Human beings are gregarious creatures; living in a society is all about building connections. Developing relationships, however, is easier said than done. What makes it so challenging is the sense of vulnerability that has been deeply rooted in modern civilizations.

Vulnerability, typically appearing in the form of shame, is the fears or doubts a person has about themselves – the worries that they are not good enough in various ways (aspects) and thus do not deserve to be loved or accepted. Not surprisingly, theses negative feelings are prevalent but not very welcomed among mankind. The ways people deal with these dark thoughts fall into two distinct categories. Their different reactions lead to opposite existences.

Some people choose to numb themselves, indulging themselves in drugs, alcohol and the like and pretending that their susceptibility to self-doubt doesn't exist. The problem is not only that agonies and depression are numbed, the abilities to feel joy and happiness are also taken away. Their typical second response is being stubborn in their views and intolerant of different religious or political beliefs in an attempt to make themselves feel more secure. In the pursuit of perfection they treat themselves harshly and try to perfect their offspring as well, which in turn passes the suffering on to the next generation. Self-centered, they are blind to the adverse effects their deeds have on others. People in this category, in a nutshell, try to do away with vulnerability. They end up being tightly trapped in it, finding themselves disconnected and isolated from others.

People in the second category embrace vulnerability. They have learned that insecurities are part and parcel of their lives and have managed to make peace with it. Knowing how to live with imperfections, these people dare to show the world who they are, rather than who they are expected or supposed to be. Truly believing that what makes them vulnerable also makes them worthy of love and belonging, they are willing to express authentic feelings, to be the first one to get the ball rolling, to give, even though there are no guarantees of a return. They, as a result, build connections as a reward by itself. Vulnerability is not a curse for them, but instead a breeding ground for pleasure, love and belonging.

Vulnerability is a blessing in disguise. Only those who have the courage to come toward it can see through the camouflage and reap the rewards.
___________________________________________________________________________________________

*"Themself" as a natural progression from "themselves" has neither been officially nor widely accepted. In formal writing it's best to avoid it. :wink:
*"Susceptibility" is not always synonymous with "vulnerability".

The final paragraph is pure perfection! :lol:

___________________________________________________________________________________________

Hi Sherry, you've done it again! 8) Likewise, don't hesitate to question me on any of my suggestions.

___________________________________________________________________________________________

In the speech, Brene Brown views the word “vulnerability” from a positive perspective and gives it a brand new meaning.

Brown majored in social work and has spent years on social work research. She started her academic career with the study of human connection, for she believed that connection provided meaning to our being in this world. In her research, she studied a considerable number of cases and found that people were more focused on disconnection when talking about connection. She dug into this issue and further discovered that this phenomenon came from the sense of “shame” in human nature; that is, people were afraid of disconnection, and that other people would find out or know that they were not worthy of connection.

She examined cases and sorted out people who had a strong sense of love and belonging from those struggling for it, and then came to a critical conclusion: the former believed that they were WORTHY of love and belonging. She further pointed out what those people had in common: they were wholehearted, had a sense of courage to be imperfect, had the compassion to be kind to themselves first, and then to others, and most important of all, they were willing to let go of whom they thought they should be to forge authentic connections.

The other common feature they shared was their embrace of vulnerability. They considered vulnerability necessary and fundamental to human connection. Brown emphasizes that we live in a world where vulnerability is inevitable. If we try to numb the bad feelings caused by unfortunate events, other good feelings such as happiness will be numbed, too. In addition, people tend to discharge pain and discomfort by asserting themselves and blaming others, and try to pretend in order to avoid the sense of vulnerability, which turns out making their lives even worse and messier. The ways to enhance connection are to let ourselves be fully seen by others, to love with a whole heart even without any guarantees of a return, to practice gratitude, to lean into joy, and to believe we are enough.
___________________________________________________________________________________________

*"One's awareness of oneself", or "self-awareness", denotes the awareness that one exists as an individual being, or the sense of who one is. Brown talks more about the self-(or other-)imposed image of oneself as the thing to let go.

Excellent use of "phenomenon", "former" and "enhance". :D Great job!
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Kat C
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Re: YOYO-ISG 110102 The Power of Vulnerability

文章janet12tw » 週日 1月 02, 2011 7:59 am

Brene Brown, the researcher/ story-teller about vulnerability, tell us people who look worthy simply feel worthiness in themselves and embrace their vulnerability. They practice compassion and are not afraid to be seen inside out. They know people are not perfect. And because of the imperfectness makes each one of us unique. Also, she thinks we should educate our kids to be themselves instead of being perfect in every way. We will feel more joy and happiness if we open our hearts and love the people around us.
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Re: YOYO-ISG 110102 The Power of Vulnerability

文章Kat C » 週二 1月 04, 2011 12:54 am

Hi Janet,

Beautiful writing! :) Here's the piece with suggested wordings:

-------------------------
"Brene Brown, the researcher/storyteller of vulnerability, tells us that people who seem worthy of respect simply feel worthy themselves and embrace their vulnerability. They practice compassion and are not afraid to let their inner self be seen. They know that people are not perfect, and that the imperfections make each one of us unique. Also, she thinks that we should educate our kids to be themselves instead of being perfect in every way. We will feel more joy and happiness if we open our hearts and love the people around us."
-------------------------

It was a fun chat on Skype. Hope to talk to you again soon!
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Re: YOYO-ISG 110102 The Power of Vulnerability

文章Kooper » 週三 1月 05, 2011 5:16 pm

Dear Kat and other ISG members,

I revisited the first half of the speech. Here are the parts that I don't quite follow. As you can see that I have difficulties following the speaker's jokes. Please help me get a better handle on them. Thanks.

0:59 What is magic pigcey(?) and why people laughed here?
2:53 That was my montral(?)
6:10 but I have to ___ everyone else's time.
7:59 I have a slight office supply dictionary (?) and why people laughed here?
8:38 Because I always go this ___and ___(?) crazy things. Why people laugh?
10:31 The willingness to breathe through waiting for the doctor to call after your ____
14:11 It was slugfast(?)
Kooper
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Re: YOYO-ISG 110102 The Power of Vulnerability

文章Kat C » 週三 1月 05, 2011 8:44 pm

Hi Kooper,

Wow, you are such a hard worker! :wink:
Here's to answer your questions:

1. A “magic pixie” is like a fairy. She was joking that if the “researcher” title was too boring they could exaggerate even more by calling her a magic pixie to attract an audience.
2. Instead of taking up the popular saying in social work, “Lean into the discomfort of the work”, her MANTRA is to “Knock discomfort upside the head and move it over and get all A's.” A “mantra” in Hinduism originally means words for chanting, but now is used to mean a motto – a principle you live by and repeat to yourself often.
3. “So I can tell you a lot about shame, but I have to borrow everyone else's time.” - She didn't want to go into detail about shame because it would take up too much time.
4. “I have a slight office supply ADDICTION.” - She organizes her work with a lot of office supplies. People joke about this kind of quirk.
5. “My husband left town with the kids. Because I always go into this kind of Jackson Pollock crazy thing... “ Jackson Pollock was a painter famous for his crazy “paint pouring” technique. People laughed here picturing her way of working, so intense that the family had to get away!
6. A “mammogram” is a screening procedure for detecting breast cancer.
7. “It was a slugfest.” - A “slugfest” is a heavy and brutal fight. She was describing how tough it was for her to tackle her vulnerability.

You definitely have good ears!
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Re: YOYO-ISG 110102 The Power of Vulnerability

文章janet12tw » 週四 1月 06, 2011 9:51 pm

Hi Kat,

Thanks for your correction! It is so nice to have you in ISG. I really learn a lot from your advice posted on the forum. And it is nice to chat with you, too! Talk to you soon this Sunday!

Regards,
Janet
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Re: YOYO-ISG 110102 The Power of Vulnerability

文章Kooper » 週一 1月 10, 2011 10:56 pm

Hi Kat,

I have several questions about your corrections. Hopefully you don't mind that I didn't raise them as soon as you posted the proofread piece. If it is going to take your lots of words to explain, maybe we can discuss them during the meeting. Thank you for your great help!

1. What's the difference between "their second typical response" and "their typical second response"?

2. There are places where I add redundant commas or omit commas that are required. I used to think that when a prepositional phrase like "In an attempt to..." or "In the pursuit of..." is placed in the front of a sentence, a comma is needed after the phrase, while when it is placed in the end of the sentence, either with or without comma in front of the phrase is fine. The same rule applies to clauses with coordinating conjunctions. Is it wrong understanding? What about "rather than?" Is there a rule of when to add a comma and when not?

- Their typical second response is being stubborn in their views and intolerant of different religious or political beliefs in an attempt to make themselves feel more secure. (no comma before "in an attempt to")
- In the pursuit of perfection they treat themselves harshly and try to perfect their offspring as well, which in turn passes the suffering on to the next generation. (no comma after "In the pursuit of perfection")
- Knowing how to live with imperfections, these people dare to show the world who they are, rather than who they are expected or supposed to be.(comma is needed before "rather than")
- they are willing to express authentic feelings, to be the first one to get the ball rolling, to give, even though there are no guarantees of a return. (comma is needed before "even though")


3. "which in turn makes the suffering being inherited from generation to generation."
=> In the case of bad habits or personalities that we learned from our parents, can't we use "inherit"?

4. "Knowing how to live with imperfections, these people dare to show the world who they are, rather than who they are expected or supposed to be."
=> The definition of folk/folks looks fine to me. It is also not an informal usage. I just wonder why we cannot use "the folks" to replace "these people."

5. "They, as a result, build connections as a reward by itself."
=> Does the add of "by itself" change the meaning of the sentence or just add emphasis to it? Does the sentence miss something without "by itself"
Kooper
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Re: YOYO-ISG 110102 The Power of Vulnerability

文章Kat C » 週二 1月 11, 2011 8:49 pm

Hi Kooper,

These are GREAT questions! And if I can't get to them by Sunday, we'll sure to talk at the ISG Skype meeting. How's that?

Kat
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